Every new year I spend days thinking of goals or dreams for the next year. But the last few years taught me that no amount of plans can prepare you for life. Life can shift in an instant and change every plan you thought you made. I continue to make goals and plans to keep myself focused, but ready for the shift. Ive had to learn to not be anxiously waiting on the shift. Like the saying "waiting for the other shoe to drop". It can become easy to expect bad things to happen. But the shift of life isn't always bad. Even the "Bad" shift can be good in the end. I know....youre probably thinking there are "bad" shifts that are just bad. But honestly the bad is only bad if you choose to see it that way. The shift can be painful, but it can be used for good. The divorce, the health scare, even the death of someone you love, can give you new life perspective that can be good.
I have had five miscarriages. Three of those were in the second trimester. With the last loss, my body couldn't recover and I lost the ability to have a baby at all. These were BAD shifts. These were painful times. There are still moments my heart aches for the babies I will never hold here on earth. All the loss was unexplained. We had every test done to find no answers at all. Geez, this comedians blog is super sad. yeah, life is super sad at times. But the sad times make the good times so much sweeter. After the last loss I was determined to take control of my body and health. I was overweight and the pregnancies had made me very sick each time. I was ready to feel good. The year after the last loss I lost 80lbs. This made me 110lbs smaller than my largest weight. I'm still learning what makes me healthy and what my body needs. The weightloss journey helped me take care of myself and may of saved my life. A sweet friend said "Michelle those babies may of saved your life". She was right. Those losses pushed me to take control of my body and my health. That "bad" shift changed me forever, not just as a woman experiencing loss, but taught me how strong I am, how strong my marriage is, and how much I love children. My kids are so precious. Any time I get to spend with them will forever be treasured for me.
Whatever your "bad" life shift is right now, it can lead to good. You can the pain and come out stronger than ever. We are not victims of our circumstances but survivors of pain, warriors of the battle of life, victorious over the pain. Praying for you, and for me, that we see the "bad" life shifts this year as ways to become stronger warriors.
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